General Conference 2012

This time last year I was in Utah with Liz and Cainan getting ready to see general conference together. That was a great time as I remember it. I got to know Cainan so much better and to at that time as we soent that weekend together I really got to slowly fall in love with him, but that was a year ago. This is now. Although it's nice reminiscing on those times, remembering how he was the greatest reason that I was so immensely happy with life at the time. Now a year later, it's sad thinking about how fast time passes you. How a time where you love everything about life quickly can turn into the greatest emotional roller-coaster of your life in one single moment. When I went with Liz and Allie to watch him open his mission call just a couple weeks ago, I couldn't help but feel immensely overjoyed and excited and just so happy and proud. He's finally going to be doing what he has wanted for so long, to serve the Lord and to become greater in terms with himself and the Lord. 

I just watched the first session of general conference and oh boy, my mind has been blown away. I've never felt so much during conference before, even when I was in Salt Lake even--nothing compared to what I felt this morning. I'm just so thankful for the living prophets and for their counsel. All those words of guidance and prophetic wise words-- I love it. The joy and happiness that the Gospel gives me is what helps me each day to have hope that life will grant me what I desire most in this world, it gives me the hope and determination to live each day without regret and to have faith that my trials and my sadness will one day be lifted from me. 

When the prophet went up, he announced two pieces of grand revelation. First he announced the building of two new temples which is great, but then he just lit the biggest spark in my heart when he announced that the age for women to be able to serve missions is lowered from 21 to age 19. I'm 19. When he said that, I couldn't help but cry. Cry about my inner questioning about whether I want to serve a mission or not. It's not an obligation for women to serve missions since we're advised to be more in preparation for creating our families  but I can't help but think about me serving a mission. I've told everyone whenever they asked me if I was ever going to serve a mission when I turned 21. I would shrug it off and say no. I was more focused on marriage and my eternal family, but now, after that, the thought of me going on a mission has taken over my mind up to the point that I'm strongly considering it. Going on a mission would help me forget myself, forget everything in my life and solely focus on bring others to Christ. At this point in life, I think that's exactly what I need in my life. I need that feeling of total concern for others and a desire to preach the word of the Lord to all those that will want to hear it. I believe that it will strengthen my testimony (of course) as well as help me heal myself emotionally. I will be able to stand firmer in my beliefs and I will be able to grow even closer to the Lord. 

Of course, it's all up to the Lord and whether or not a mission is what He has in store for me.