On the way to the airport from home, nice and chill until it was time to get out and drag all my things to the terminal. I found Liz! That was fun. It's really great being with her again, I really missed the laughs we have and how she always makes me laugh.
I seriously don't know what's going on. I already miss home and it hasn't been 24 hrs yet since I saw my mom. The thing is, I feel so sad for her. She's alone now, without me. She even told me how I bring the laughter and happiness every time I'm home. Like last night, we had a last cuddle session and ended up talking till like 4 in the morning. It was really nice, minus the part where I started crying. I really hate that. He really makes me cry. Just thinking about how he's over there doing who knows what; probably getting drunk and stuffing his face. What keeps me awake at night is the thought that I mean nothing to him at all, that he dropped me like that. How is that even possible? Doesn't he have the least bit of heart? Isn't his conscience killing him right now? How is a human being capable of such evilness, of so much lack of compassion? It really makes me so sad that the one man in my life that was always supposed to be there, isn't. He instead chose some strangers over us.
If you really think about, Satan did this. Years back Pres. Hinckley talked about how this time would be when Satan would most attack families and do whatever to tear them apart. Our family wasn't perfect or happy per say, but it was enough to keep me content. There were the occasional fights and disagreements like all families have. He even didn't make a big fuss about us being in the Church. Then that stupid lie appeared and he changed dramatically. He started to blame everything on the Church and eventually it became unbearable living with him. I saw how very slowly hate started to consume him and how in away he let himself be controlled by Satan. Then that other lady appeared and things got from bad to worse. And at the end of it all, Satan won.
Whoever reads this, whoever you may be; I cannot stress enough how you should hold and appreciate your family. You are blessed to have the family you have, putting aside all the things they do to drive you crazy. You're lucky to have them. Do everything to keep your home at peace, do everything to keep the Spirit in your home. Don't let contention in your home, don't let the adversary win.
Through my example it says that my dad will change through my example, but how?
At the end of the day though, I'm a big cry baby who really misses and loves her dad and just wants that family that she's never been able to have.
But I will, when I get married. And I seriously can't wait because family is the greatest thing on Earth.
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