Stop infiltrating my subconscious

Today has been a blur it feels like, it has come and gone too fast. The weekend has come and gone too fast basically.

I finally got a calling today! And guess what it is...family history indexer! Like seriously, the Lord knows me so well. He knows that's it's my goal this semester to become more involved in family history. He knows that I desire to become closer with my kindred dead. He knows that I want this. He just knows me so well it's amazing.

So yesterday was the general relief society conference. I totally forgot since I spent all of yesterday working on my American Epidemic class and the readings. We're starting with basic inorganic chem. I remember it being so nice for me back in high school, but apparently I forgot everything I spent hours trying to memorize. While reading, I'm like, "what the heck have I gotten myself into?" because everything that I was reading and trying to understand was turning into mush in my head. But I got it, I devised a little study guide for each chapter, hehehehe. You shall be defeated wretched chemistry!

Anyway, conference. It was great! There was this speaker especially that just touched my heart so much that the tears trickled down like raindrops. She talked about how the Lord will listen to you no matter the issue. He loves you and finds you so precious. He has felt every pain for you and He's willing to help lift you up if you seek him out. When you pray, spill out your heart to Him. Spill out your every desire, your every pain, your every burden, your every feeling. He knows what you're going through so seek Him out when you feel like you can't take it anymore, when you feel so weak that the only thing you can do is fall to your knees and speak to Him. If you really think about it, the Lord is like my own personal shrink. Although He's not physically there, you can feel Him there next to you, lifting you up as you pour out your heart to Him. Prayer is wonderful, it really is. Every time I feel like praying isn't going to do anything, I think back to that one time where he told me to pray for help. Although we're practically strangers know it seems, that phrase, as insignificant and simple as it was at the moment really opened my eyes from that moment on. Yeah, why hadn't I thought of it before? Prayer, simple. From then on, I turn to prayer for my troubles and for my feelings of inadequacy. I guess there's a reason for everything right? Maybe people just come into your life to teach you and give you something to learn from and nothing more. That's life it seems. You may not like it and want them to stay, but if they did their job, what more can you do?

Oh maaan, fast Sundays make me so extremely hungry. Like all day, even after I eat after fasting.
Might as well go eat dinner. Then Liz so graciously is making me cookies. I sure do crave chocolate so it works out. Ahhhh, I sure do appreciate her and what she does for me.