12 days

That is all there is left. Because up to this point, I've had it with the loudness, the unnecessary screaming over stupid things, the awkwardness when there's a make-out party in the living room, my butter disappearing before my eyes, getting the door shut every single freaking time when I make it clear I want it to be kept open and especially, most importantly, the blasting of country music. My poor ears. But I got them back by blasting my own music, mwahaha.

This song. My mom introduced me to him with this song. It's so beautiful...except for the part about Mormons. It's not bad really, just that he kinda puts down our belief in the Word of Wisdom. Aside from that, the message of this song is great.

I really love that I can fall in love with all types of music of all different kinds- except country. That's where I cross the line. 

So, I had this long talk with my mom today. It's so nice hearing from her, to hear her say that she feels at peace when I advice her and comfort her with my words. I'm glad.
I should really start taking my own advice; to not care about the future, to stop worrying about things that are uncertain. To just leave everything up to the Lord. Whatever is supposed to happen will happen on it's own terms. For once I want to stop trying so hard to get the things I want. I've been working so hard at everything. And for once I want everything to fall in place on it's own. Especially with this. I'm not giving up, I just want to stop trying so hard for one. The ambitious and passionate person in me won't allow me to really give up. no, I'll still work towards what I want to happen, just that I won't give it my all. When I give it my all and it doesn't go as I hoped it would--I end up the emotional wreck I try to avoid.

Es ir al cielo y abrir la puerta
Meterse a un cuarto de un dios noctambulo
Y esperar a que este dormido
Para robarle algun verso suyo. 

I'm sorry I lead a sad life and vent on here. Reading sad things is not a great thing, but, like I explained it to a friend a few days ago, I write all of this not to make people feel sorry for me, but for someone, somewhere out there can learn from what I give. Can see that aside from all the crap I go through, I'm still here. And so grateful for it.